Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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