I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
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