I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
Randomize