what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
Randomize
