so that wasnt chicken after all
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
Randomize
