There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I'm jealous of your bromance
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
