Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
Randomize
