Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Randomize
