Three words: puerto rican gang bang
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
Randomize
