recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
Randomize
