Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
That accounts for only three of the penises
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
Randomize
