that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
Randomize
