let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Randomize
