do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
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