She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
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