When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
got arrested for "breaking and entering" last night when i supposedly went into the wrong house made a sandwich and tried jerking off to porn on the tv...the cops told me they came in while my dick was out...oh and i missed work this morning and got fired
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
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