also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
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