Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
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