I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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