and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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