have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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