Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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