But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize
