what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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