Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
