32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
Randomize
