Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Randomize
