$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
Princesses don't give blow jobs
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
I am mentally ready for anal.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
Randomize