Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
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