i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Randomize
