We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
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