4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
we have pet lesbian snakes
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
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