Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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