Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
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