Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
Randomize
