i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
