You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
Randomize
