i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Randomize
