Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
i think im in europe. pls send help
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
