so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
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