Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
Randomize
