Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
