Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
