For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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