oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
I am naked and annoyed.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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