Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
Randomize
