I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
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