I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
I'm like, not good at living.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize
