his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
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