Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
Randomize
