Just mADE A PArabola og urine
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
Randomize
